Luscious

To be born a human...

I miss my Jazz CDs. They're not with me now when I need them the most. Feeling somehow down and blue today. Then again, it's me...I always think too much when I shouldn't. How could I when I have so much things going on happening in my life? Tell you how it feels like. It feels like falling off a building into infinity. You pass by windows trying to call out for help. Some sees you and tried to help but couldn't and some sees you but they just pretended not to see you because they have other stuff to worry about...or perhaps they're just plain selfish. Then again, in the beginning, it was your own decision. YOU decided to jump off the building. You KNEW the consequences but you did it anyways. Why? No matter how complicated a human behaviour could be, there's always an explanation. Frustrated and fed up is all I can feel now. Somehow, I think I'm always stuck to a NO-WIN situation. Whatever it is...I can't find the reasons.

I'm so tired..........................really really tired..............................

I don't know... Am I too nice? Am I naive? Or am I just plain stupid?

Missing my fav choco, my fav coffee and my fav jazz collections. Helps me to clear my mind a lot. Of course, there are times when after the second bite of choco, I could feel tears welling up in my eyes and trickling down my cheeks.

To think about it, I am definitely happy to be born a human but the irony is emotions are hard to control. Beautiful it is...to feel pain and happiness.

........beautiful.......

posted by ixovelle @ 5/11/2005 05:26:00 AM